Safe spaces

Dear internet,

I am quite literally incapable of visualizing faces. However, I am very good at remembering the exact layouts of places I’ve visited. So when I don’t have anything to do and my phone has crapped out on me once again, I close my eyes and walk through my favorite places. It’s very relaxing. I can tour the National Gallery of Art, take the furnicular up to Mount Washington, or walk to the grocery store in a place I lived five years ago. It’s like Google Maps but in my brain.

I really wish I could see a picture of my baby’s face in my mind, though It’s just a like a blank flesh-colored circle when I try to imagine it. I can’t imagine a picture of my own face either, I have no idea what I look like really.

Blogging feels a little like walking out into the cool crunchy snow at night, the night sky lit up all orange from the reflection of the snow, seeing my breath, and listening to the stillness, a dog barking in the distance, knowing I can retreat into my warm house in just a few steps. A safe and peaceful space.